Saturday, June 16, 2012

The time I found out I was a grown up, or wait a minute...

Nobody wants to get old.

not a single person.

Maybe when you are 13 you can't wait to be 16

When you are 16 you can't wait to be 18

18 then turns to 21

and then what? are you really excited to turn 25 just so you can rent a car? (maybe only in WA)

I am only 23 and I feel like I have hit all my milestones, can I just stay like this.

(Is this real life?)

Sweet 16...ahhhh

Driving by myself, way too fast oh and i still do that crying my way out of every possible ticket. Maybe a few highschool parties, but all in all at 16 I was definitely trying to figure out what I should do in life.

Check out those cholo eyebrows...

The bittersweetness of having some authority to go where I want when I want, but also still having to obey the parents on what time I will be home and why the truck is caked with mud when I was 'going shopping'

I dunno, they ripped up the mall parking lot and there were huge dirt mounds and you just couldn't go around them...
alright maybe not. I do realize now that my parents were not as stupid as I always thought they were. Dammit. 

This is the important stuff they teach you in high school.

Now we get to 18

I can do whatever the fuck I want now! Psh I'm an adult!
So as the responsible adult I am at 18, with my car that I can go anywhere I want before midnight

Ya I joined a team of rockstar girls (I am far left if you couldn't figure it out) I thought I would do some modeling with my cholo eyebrows, 5'5 statue, no boobs, and really bad bleach job, but I could run fast!!!

21!!!! The milestone of lifetime! Oh I wish I could go with the knowledge I have now, these 2 years have taken a brutal beating on what 21 was

 I wasn't naked, sweet snuggie made my tube top look like no top

Ok so let's recap a little on 18...

You shotgun a beer

You beer bong 2 beers

You take your first shot of tequila

Some crazy ass buys you a snuggie for your birthday

You still think you're a model, when you have noting going for you

So then you dig WAY deep and think that doing club promo's is awesome and you are the shit!

Then you get really wasted tailgating for a Seahawks/Saints game, try and eat 2 hotdogs at the same time
(They wouldn't go in sideways, damn!)

And you end up leaving early because the Seahawks FINALLY dominated and you wore your other team jersey and got booed so bad you went home.

Now here we go with up to date!
at 23

Alright 23....You are still a drinking mess and can't learn not to mix sugar, with sugar, with more sugar, and possibly another sugar drink. but you do anyways and then lay in the car with a pillow over you face you entire 3 hour ride home. 
You are staying a little classy by actually wearing clothing that covers, your tits, midsection and ass and that my dear you should be proud of!

Running over street signs because they have your cousins name on them who was tragically killed in Iraq and need to give it to your uncle no matter what the cost. priceless

well took my first keg stand.

I will tell you all that i don't drink that much, and really I don't I hold my liquor pretty well through the years and surprising enough I know when to stop. 

I just look like an alcoholic party girl because I am not going to take pictures of myself wearing my spider man boxers, eating cap n' crunch cereal and watching spongebob

I mean would you really want to see that anyways?

So in between all these pictures there is a girl who thinks she is lame at most times, not as interesting as you may think and live a daily normal life, where a party comes up possibly once a month. Maybe.

But these are the pictures I will be hiding from my kids till they are mature enough to know that mommy was a sloppy drunk from 20-22 1/5

then of course every time in between when they really piss me off

What the hell am I saying?! i don't even have kids! See 23!!! You are screwing i am thinking about my well being for a child who isn't even thought of! and I enjoy grocery shopping for cleaning supplies and toilet paper.

Kill me now. 


Anna Combrink said...

Oh, girlfriend. I'm only twenty and I'm already hitting this WTF I don't want to get older. Ughhh.

Ash said...

umm.. so the first part of this post, i had the damn sound of music song in my head: you are 16 goin gon 17...


then we get to the pictures of you at 21 and I SWEAR, we would and COULD be the very best friends (and you would fit in quite nicely down here in southern california...)

so yes, as a 27 yr old lemme tell you, shit aint nothing but a gangsta party, as tupac would say, and the drinking continues.. only you learn to be classy with it (ie drinking champagne straight from a bottle at your friends wedding..)

all im saying is, no judgement here.. and if you drink that much or dont or puke it all up or whatever, at least you fucking partied.. right?


(i just felt like this comment needed to end with "word.".. so sue me..)

Nikole E! said...


As a fellow 23 year old I totally feel ya! What the hell is life coming to and I only take pictures drinking as well! (My mom's friend even thinks I have a drinking problem bc of my blog) Oh to get old... : ]

Amber said...

I felt this way, too... and now I am older, and the thought of getting ready to go out tonight is making me sleepy!!!

So glad you posted today, Girlie!!! Have an amazing weekend :)

julia rose said...

New Followahhh here! Found you through Ashley at Adventures of Newlyweds and I already follow your incredible cousin, Raven! Can I just say that this post brought back SO many good, bad, drunken memories of myself. I'm 24 and relate in so many ways, thank you for sharing!!

Anonymous said...

I look at my pictures and laugh then I feel all old. I'm 22 and have a baby. I may go to a party once every two to three months maybe. I will have my pictures hid from Zaiden too! It's funny I always thought my mom was dumb and didn't know anything either , Wrong! Thanks for sharing.

Ashley said...

hahaha Tay you always make me laugh. i think from 16-23 you are a fun time and freaking gorgeous.....even with cholo eyebrows....which I DIED over.

ahhhh and you're getting married SO STINKING SOON!!!! I'm so excited for you.

love you muffinhead!

Amy W. said...

cholo eyesbrows ahaha!!!

whats up with the purple lips too?
and the candy wrappers on the wall?

i need to get me some boobs ASAP!